We'd known the basement door's lock catch had been installed - by some previous owner - badly. What we didn't notice at first was that it had been installed so badly as to become art - aligned in no reference frame, its bulging mass obeying some geometry which could only be described as a combination of Lovecraftian and German Expressionist, it was as though it had not been installed at all, but instead had impacted, crashing into the doorframe with great force, rending and ripping the wood with its ponderous metal bulk - a primal act of nature, torn from the rock of another world, thrown through space and then smelted, burning, uncaring, through the atmosphere of our Earth before finally landing, dull and dead, in the frame of our basement door - a lock-catch hurled into existance by God.
The lock itself, of course, could only have been an afterthought, a pale
and sad follow-on to the greater verk - and as such merits no
further comment.